All of my infected exes live in Texas. Or at least, noted Trevor Noah, panicked tonight, as he lamented the decision of Texas, Mississippi and a handful of other states to abide by pandemic restrictions.
“New infections are on the rise,” Noah said, warning that “before new variants get in our way,” it’s important to mask yourself and gain social distance.
He reserved special contempt for New York State, which will institute “dance zones” for weddings this spring. The restriction means that you can only dance with people from your own wedding table in a specified and socially remote area.
“Wait,” Noah said. “If you’re going to a wedding in New York City, can you only dance with your own family in your own dance zone?” I would hate to apply this rule if I was a wedding DJ. “Too far, too far! Stay in your zone! “
Noah claimed Texas is still receiving 7,000 new cases of Covid-19 every day, making the decision to fully reopen and remove the mask rules confusing for him.
He suggested that state governors may have adopted a strange take on the children’s fable about the tortoise and the hare. As they read it, governors proclaim, “What a great story about a bunny who took a refreshing nap!
Even while the vaccines are being rolled out, it’s still important to mask yourself, keep our distance, and NOT do what Texas is doing. pic.twitter.com/sFKDF0kt6O
– The Daily Show (@TheDailyShow) March 4, 2021