Minecraft Creeper Crunch Cereal review – Gaming for breakfast

How often does something get so big that it gets its own cereal? I guess the answer to that question is probably “a lot,” but I have to admit that I don’t know because I’m not really in the habit of following cereals based on pop culture phenomena. I remember Overwatch getting some kind of cereal. I’m sure there was cereal for Frozen at one point or another. As a child, I even distinctly remember seeing “Stevie’s Stars” cereal on store shelves, featuring and named after none other than famed Detroit Red Wings Captain Steve Yzerman. That, of course, was a Michigan thing, and even then it was probably only a south Michigan thing.

But I digress. Whatever the threshold of popularity one needs to meet in order to have a cereal named in one’s honor, Minecraft has met it. Kellogg’s and Microsoft have teamed up to create and release the cereal that Minecraft has earned through years of enduring popularity and it is here at last. For some reason, I’m reviewing it, despite the fact that I usually review video games and other inedible things.

Am I qualified to do this review? Absolutely not. I don’t eat cereal very often and it’s been years since I last played Minecraft (I’m more of a Terraria guy myself). Will you have a better sense of whether or not this product is worth buying when you finish reading my review? It’s hard to say but ultimately I make no promises; it’s entirely likely you’ll be more unsure of whether you should buy this product by the time you finish this review.

I’m tempted to just say “yes, this is worth buying” without any other qualifications because it costs like four bucks a box (Ed. – Minecraft Creeper Crunch costs $4 for an 8 ounce box and $5.69 for a 12.7 ounce box). This isn’t some $60 video game or some $1,000 smartphone. It’s cereal. Sugary, crunchy cereal with marshmallows that are varying shades of green. Children, I suspect, will want it and enjoy eating it just because it’s got a Minecraft creeper on the box. Minecraft superfans will buy it and put it on a shelf in the hopes that one day it’ll be worth something (it will not be). Either way, taste never really comes into the equation.

For what it’s worth, Minecraft Creeper Crunch doesn’t taste bad. It’s no Frosted Flakes, but it’s also no store-brand wheat squares either. The actual cereal part is cinnamon flavored, though it isn’t a very strong cinnamon. It doesn’t get soggy in milk if you eat it at a decent clip, but if you’re the type who likes to savor their cereal (assuming those people actually exist), I would expect it to be soggy by the time you reach the bottom of the bowl.

The marshmallows taste exactly the same as the marshmallows in Lucky Charms to me. I don’t know if there are some subtle notes that my unrefined palate is failing to pick up on, but if you like Lucky Charms’ marshmallows, I think you’ll like these too.

Visually, Creeper Crunch is not great, but again, I don’t think that really matters to the target demographic. I grew up in the age of blue ketchup, so suffice to say neon green marshmallows are hardly enough to get me to raise an eyebrow. Just as kids somehow thought that ketchup looked appealing back in the day, so too will they be drawn to this cereal.

It’s worth noting that each box comes with a code that unlocks a cosmetic item you can equip in the character creator for both Minecraft Bedrock Edition and Minecraft Earth. There are 10 codes in all, and while the front of the box shows you one item you have a chance of obtaining from these codes, you ultimately don’t know what you’ll get until you redeem the code yourself.

So, this is both cereal and a blind bag rolled into one. I’m not a big fan of the blind bag style of selling toys or anything else, but cereal makers have been packing random toys in their boxes since time immemorial so this is technically nothing new. If Creeper Crunch’s green box doesn’t get your kid’s attention, the promise of a code for a cosmetic item might – I wouldn’t be surprised to learn that there are Minecraft players out there buying the cereal for the cosmetic code alone.

At the end of it all, if you have a child who enjoys Minecraft, this is almost assuredly a safe buy. If you’re an adult who likes Minecraft, you should probably skip this and eat something a little more healthy for breakfast. If you’re an adult who likes Minecraft so much that you’re going to buy 10 boxes of this and try to resell them in 20 years, consider not doing that.

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